I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize