i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
