Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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