Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Randomize
