Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
