Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
