dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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