But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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