sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"