People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize