i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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