OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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