What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
