Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
