i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
