So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
