Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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