so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize