I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
