yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
