My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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