I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
