...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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