so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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