my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
