just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize