the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
