yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
