So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
