Insert tab A into swedish slot B
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You smell like stripper and shame
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"