We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!