Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
