Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
one might say we're banned from that church
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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