He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
