he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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