Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
