I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
