I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
