Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
