my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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