8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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