Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
