It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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