Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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