You're so nebulous sometimes
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
