I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
