it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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