I think my fart just growled at me.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
