I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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