I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
we're so committed to being not committed
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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