does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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